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Ask Patty: Bringing Sexy Back

Ask Patty: Bringing Sexy Back
A post-pregnancy body can keep you from feeling as sexy as pre-baby, but our sexpert shares some ways to restore the intimacy in your relationships and the confidence you've been missing.


"I have a hard time being naked and intimate with my boyfriend with the lights on. I don't want him seeing me naked since I gave birth to our baby. I just don't feel sexy and don't want him to be grossed out."
— Maggie (Kenwood, OH)

 

 

Patty:

 

It's so important to celebrate your body throughout the various phases and milestones of life. If you're unhappy with the way your body looks, it may help to channel that energy into positive, transformative activities, such as exercise, which can make you feel better now and in the future.

 

One challenge of new mothers is finding the time to work on getting back their pre-baby body. However, there are alternatives. If your significant other isn't able to watch your child so that you can get away for 30 minutes to the gym, try picking out some workout videos that you can use while your baby is sleeping. On-Demand fitness channels also are included in many cable networks. Be careful of two of the biggest obstacles when trying to get back in shape: making excuses and procrastinating.

 

Unfortunately, women are often so hard on themselves when it comes to their bodies and the expectations they set for themselves. Also, they are influenced by some of the unrealistic standards imposed on them from society. When someone truly loves you, they shouldn't judge you, and if anything, he should be grateful that you have gone through such a transformation to bring such a blessing into the world. His body has probably gone through changes over the years, and more than likely, you haven't seen him in any different light.

 

To appreciate your own transformation, light a spark. Candles are a wonderful way to add romance and ambience, as soft lighting is flattering to any body type. You also can wear something that makes you feel sexy. Keep an open mind and shop around until you find something that makes you feel comfortable and attractive. Whether it's a cute pair of boy shorts and matching bra or a cute nightie, pampering yourself with sexy sleepwear (or even a relaxing soak in the tub) can add a touch of sensuality that has been missing in the bedroom.

 

I also would recommend reading my book, Pure Romance Between the Sheets. I split the book into two sections, with the first concentrating on your own personal journey and the second half focusing on the relationship. I did this because I believe that you can't make someone else happy until you have discovered what brings you pleasure and satisfaction. Confidence is not something one should fake in the bedroom, and the more educated you are on your body and sexuality, the more natural confidence you will bring to your intimate relationship.

Patty Brisben -

Patty Brisben is the CEO and Founder of Pure Romance. She is Cincy Chic's relationship columnist, and you can send her an e-mail at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .


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